The essence of beauty is in the fabrication of time itself. It weaves around the bends and disposes fragments of pieces in the hearts of many. When the night disappears and the day comes back it brings with it a new meaning that few can understand, but those that do will cherish it with all their being. Thalia plays back the last words her father said to her before he committed suicide. It was a day she will never forget, she was the first one to see her father dead, drenched in blood.
She stares at her painting, the painting she worked for weeks before she could present it to her best friend’s art agent. He had loved the painting when he first saw it. The girl sitting with her head down and wearing drab clothes while she was surrounded by paintings reminded Thalia of herself. When she was painting it she didn’t know that she was taking a part of her and putting it out there to show the world. Thalia had never been the voracious and vociferous type of girl who had too many friends to count and was popular. The only friend she had growing up was Lewis and they moved to New York together nine months ago to start college.
There has always something missing in her life, she spent most times thinking about how it would feel to belong to something or to a place. She always was the reclusive girl who the popular girls made fun of. Her world is full of social media platforms where one has to compete with thousands of people across the globe. Her life will never be as glamorous as the people on social media, she will never be the girl boys want to ask out, or the nerd that will one day own a fortune five hundred company. All she has ever had is her art. It was her father’s world and then it became hers, despite her mother trying to dissuade her from taking up a frivolous profession.
She loves everything about painting from the gentle brush strokes on the canvas to the paint smudges on her clothes and the smell of fresh paint. The problem comes that in the art world getting recognition is not easy as it seems. Her father struggled for years and when he felt that all he had worked for was slipping out of his fingers he ended his life. Her hand shakes slightly as she stares around the gallery, a coterie of enthusiasts amble around the gallery staring at Lewis Gabble’s art exhibit. Lewis’s exhibit is called People versus Technology.
He used pieces of metal to make the people and he used nuts, bolts and wires to make the technology. Thalia can see how astonished they are at his work, she is amazed at the kind of person Lewis is. He has always had talent and good timing on his side, it is how he got one of the best art agents to represent him. He is the reason why her painting is hanging on one of the walls of the Christopher Henry Gallery. Lewis moved next door to her when she was nine, he had a strange energy about him, but he had become her confidant and there were days when she needed that more than anything.
She turns back to stare at her painting that she entitled the Lost Girl. It represents who she is as a person and as an artist living in a competitive world. There are times when she sees a bit of a father in her and that scares her, her father was brilliant in more ways than one, but he was also egotistical and arrogant. He lived in his own world, a world he created with his own rules. The problem with that was her father spent so much time sequestered from the real world he forgot how to live and appreciate the criticism of the harsh world.
Lewis walks up to her and they stand next to each other taking in all that they have achieved. In this industry one needs as many true friends as possible. The world is a lonely place that can eat up anyone with a dream and the willpower to make it through the harshness of the storm.
“Hey beautiful,” Lewis smiles. “It is a roaring success,” he pumps his fists in the air. “You did great. Your father would be proud and I am sure if your mother could be here she would.”
Thalia harrumphs. “I told her and she said she was busy. When I was coming to New York to pursue my art, she said I was wasting time and resources. Lewis, she would be here if she wanted to, but she doesn’t want to. She hated my father because of his passion and I think sometimes she resents that I am not studying law like she did.”
He wraps his arm around her. “Well, I still admire you. People said we would amount to nothing Thalia, but here we are and we got here together. I wouldn’t be here if it weren’t for you.”
“Dido.”
He chortles. “Seriously, when did you start using abeyant terms.”
She smiles genuinely for the first time in years, Lewis pulls her closer to him. Thalia thinks back to when her father died. Lewis was by her side throughout the painful process, he helped her to finally let go. There are not a lot of people who will sit by you and eat two cartons of ice cream without the condescending tone. Lewis was that person for her, sometimes they would watch Korean movies to pass the time and also so that Thalia wouldn’t have to think about her father.
Some people eventually date their best friends, they see something in the uprising and the setting of the sun. They see a relationship that will last throughout the ages, but what they don’t see is the end of the relationship. She never thought of it the way most people do when they crush on their friends.
Lewis stares at Thalia. The buoyant energy that was there has been replaced by a somberness. He stiffens and his eyes skirt around like he is afraid to look at her again. There are moments when there is a reticence about Lewis.
Lewis holds out his hand and Thalia takes it. They walk outside. The night is crisp. It reminds Thalia of Van Gogh’s Starry Night painting. The night is filled with hope, the stars are a beautifully crafted masterpiece. It is as radiantly alluring as the day is an immaculate conception. Thalia shivers. Lewis leans against the brick wall and they stare at the sky.
Lewis sighs. “I have to go back to New Jersey.”
Thalia’s shoulders slack. “I don’t understand. Why?”
“Remember, when I said that it is easy to be consumed in this world when following your dreams. That is it. I don’t recognize myself anymore, it is like I am a stranger and I was raised better than that. When you are chasing your dreams you forget how easy it is for you to change into the person you never wanted to be. We loathed the people who laughed at us, who picked on us because of how different we are. I can’t be that person Thalia. I refuse to be that person.”
Thalia shrugs. “Lewis, people change it is how the world works. It is how we become better versions of ourselves. Your dreams are coming true you can’t give up and I need you.”
He grins. “You never needed me Thalia. If it makes you feel better I am not giving up, I am just taking a break from this world. Your father never could do what you are doing now. He was afraid of being better. You are amazing.You worked endlessly to prove that you are better than what people saw. You are going to be fine. Just remember that you got this!”
Her father always used to say that sometimes people get lost because they forget how great they can become. They loose themselves in pain and heartbreak instead of allowing it to fuel them. They become enraptured by what they cannot change instead of focusing on what they can change. Success is not an easy road to take, but those who walk its fiery path discover so much more about the world and themselves.
Thalia’s father forgot that. She will not. A Latin saying swirls in her mind, “Invictus Maneo.”
I Remain Unconquered. Struggles will abound, but she will remain unconquered.
Becoming Writer 2016 Anniversary Contest 